Fragile

It is pretty horrible to being involved with people when you are vulnerable. Vulnerable people are dangerous people. Sensitive people are dangerous people. They might bring you butterflies, warmest hugs, thoughtful words, and sweetest moment.

But once they explode, baby, you can't runaway from the burst.

Life Begins At The End of Comfort Zone

We are imperfect human beings, covered with worries and restlessness.
Running from things we want, hiding from our dreams.
We seek comfort, we make comfort as our refuge. We got stifled by future, choked by past.
We never realize we chase after tomorrow.
We never feel we have enough.

There is something we all look for, balance. One thing we might forget, we possess such balance through moving.
Keep moving, push through. It will always feel better than just staring blankly at the ceiling with tons of  emptiness we cannot contain anymore.

Our Generation

Our generation sits on the best lap of the world. Crunching tons of emails everyday, struggling through news feed, swimming towards the race of information. Unstoppable flow. Enormous.

Our generation views from the best spot of the world. We love, we share, though we are apart. We look for wifis more than we look for best friends. We sink ourselves on couch for hours just to click on one entertaining instagram account.

Our generation runs at the best circuit of the world. Encircling, never ending loop of edited real life. Our generation also do not have to remember anything. We can store, we can keep anything we want outside our body. We can use our brain less and less. We can trust ourselves less and less, too.

Yet, our generation also has the power to change the world.
Let there be an unstoppable flow of information,
let there be hotspots everywhere,
let there be loop of virtual world.

Our generation holds the key
to love, if we, consciously, choose. The question is : do we?


FPL

Attachment

When happiness only comes with reasons, with several terms and condition,
can it be called as a real happiness? Or is it that infamous attachment?

Yes, we attach ourselves to stuffs, to people.
What's the fundamental of it? Our own fears? Our disbelief to ourselves?
Or can it be caused of both?

Attachment wouldn't be so bad if things were rolling well.

But, how if it lately turns into kind of addiction?
If it turns into a disability to hold your own pride, an incompetence to face the truth, then you cheat on yourself, or worse you finally feel that it's okay to hurt yourself?

Like, for real, we all have to learn it hard way :
we love because we have so much,
not because we need anything in return.

Some Thoughts on Loving

Particularly, we always can tell when we are in love. We feel chemical rush, shallow breath, anxiety, which blend into one deep feeling that fulfills the heart. We start to giggle much towards unfunny things, realize that blue sky is beautiful, and wonder why we are so happy.

With these people, yes, I'm not talking about someone  you're committed to get married with, or you're in a relationship with,
I'm talking about people you love, in general,
you feel life a little bit brighter.

You surely can not define how that is happening to you, though there are several scientific facts about hormones and stuffs that affect.

We somehow just simply love. Feeling days are right when we're with them, feeling a calming sense when we can help them go through their harsh days, listen to their stories, soothe their restlessness, carry their tears, or be a shoulder to cry on.
We do it without wanting anything in return.
We just simply do. Fully, unselfishly.

When we love, sure we get to be emotional beings. We might be disappointed, might be torn, and perhaps left. But can things be worse than that? Love itself is a power. You can choose letting those negativity eat you out or let the what you have inside win.
Finally, we can learn how to overcome our fears.

Being with those whom you love brings you power to face tomorrow.

So my wish, may the love remain blooming,
whether it is a loud bright thing like fire-crackers,
or a complete silence kept in the deepest part of your heart.

Lucky Number 7

Hi. The days you don't live up to your dreams, the days you waste of your worries and anxiety, will never come back. One of my best seniors said to me today, spend your college years wisely.

So here I am, making some notes upon what to do this upcoming term. Bismillah for Term 7!

1. Getting my bachelor degree in Industrial Engineering.

2. Collecting more As! ;))))

3. Having IELTS prep & test.

4. Driving to Campus.

5. Commuting by train. (very paradox with above)

6. Love more, share more, don't get trapped in worries and anxieties of being hurt.

7. Living the daily campus life with ZEST. Learning with ZEST.

I can never stop being grateful for enriching experiences I've earned during this holiday. Internship, orientation, and some coolest stuffs plus moment between days. I am being thankful for each. Hope you also enjoy your journey.

Remember, always always be in love. Always follow your dreams.

Kiss & hugs,

Erin

One Fine Morning

Working against time, or running with it. Waving good bye to all worries and hiding from them, or just facing them, sit along with them. Choosing between what is right or what is easy, or probably just choose whatever makes you happy. Loving others because you already love yourself fully, not because of your lack. Accept things, be courageous. Remember everyday, we are very blessed to be this way.


Some short passage that keeps running in my mind. I find serenity by writing them down. I hope you feel the same by reading them, too. ;)

Much Love,
FPL

Winners

Sometimes we are too afraid to embrace what we have. We are busy to perfect the imperfect part of us, forgetting that we have so many potentials we skip to embrace, sometimes because they are not really cool, sometimes because we are so lazy to polish them, or sometimes because we stay in our comfort zone. Yesterday, on Eid, I was on my way home  after visiting cousins and relatives. It was raining outside and dad drives conveniently. I scrolled down my path, found a quote that kinda hit..

We are here to look for our infinities, not for whining over our weaknesses or trying to cover them up.

We tend to take the days for granted, running and jumping from one event to another, from one hectic moment to another one. We just survive, not literally live. We carry our burden, our fears, and worse, we feed them regularly. We take more burden, we refuse to wake up early, we are hesitant to do new things that may encourage and drive us to get better. What we feed, it will grow up. When it grows up, it will win. Win over you. Your fears will win over you if you don't back it off. Leave it and feed the rough enemy, ancient enemy of it,
hopes.

Feed your hopes. Realize that what lies behind you or what lies in front of you is not as important as what is within you. When your hopes grow up, your dreams swell, your heart becomes excited, everyday becomes magical, the fears has been beaten.

Then, you win.

Selamat hari kemenangan. Win over your fears. Let the infinite be the infinite.

Love,
FPL

Happy Eid Mubarak

taken from weheartit.com

Start fresh.

Forgiveness sets us free. Far from forgiving other, forgive yourself. For being careless. For being mean and hard to forgive. For keeping hatred and anger. For taking things for granted.
Forgive yourself for hurting people who love you. For being ridiculously rush the time. For taking life way too seriously.
Happiness sits within. After that, release your worry and tense. Leave your heartache.
May we all be contented and leave all the pain behind.
Feel your burden swiped off.

Happy Eid Mubarak 1434 H. Let's meet another Ramadhan & Eid next year. ;-)

Big Love,
Erin

F1 Night Race 2012

The only F1 Night Race you will find, is only in Singapore.

Back to last September, I dragged myself with bunch of coolest people and my favorite writer to go there. Experiencing the exquisite fast paced lane with roaring engines everywhere.  These photos were taken on the last night of the race. The Guest Star was Katy Perry and she was amazing. I also took a lot of photos of her but do not feel like post them here. Picturing the surrounding, the sky, the grass, everything was at its fuckin best,

And at that time, I swore I were infinite. :-)

Before The Eve

Tired Feet, Happy Heart

Between The Crowd

Waiting for Katy Perry

The Crowd

Festive to End

Home Inspiration

What do you think? I really love the touch of monochromatic in all pictures. All from weheartit.com

Don't Look Back

weheartit.com

Mungkinkah mencintai seseorang cukup hanya dengan punggungnya saja? Mungkinkah satu atau dua momen yang ada hanya dia yang membelakangimu namun kamu merasa cukup, diam, dan tidak bisa berteriak untuk meminta lebih? Apakah ada janji kebahagiaan ketika ia berbalik arah, tidak lagi membelakangimu? Atau mungkinkah saat itu dirimu menjadi yang pertama lari dan merasa bahwa semuanya hanya angan-angan?

Bagaimana mungkin mencintai seseorang cukup hanya dengan punggungnya saja? Bagaimana bisa satu dua tiga kata yang tersimpan terbawa angin kemudian tersampaikan? Apakah terpikir untuk kamu mencari cara agar dia tidak beranjak dari sana? Apakah dia mampu mengusir kekecewaan dan kesedihan hatimu tanpa perlu ia sedikitpun menatap? Atau haruskah semua terucap dan lebih dari sekadar bayangnya saja?

Haruskah kamu mampu menggapainya? Ataukah memang hal itu sudah lebih dari satu yang indah dalam hari ini. Cukup untuk membuat kamu tersenyum tanpa tanya. Karena mungkin, jika ia berbalik, tatapan matanya tidak seindah bayangmu. Ketika ia berbalik, senyumnya tidak selembut mimpimu. Ketika ia berbalik, kamu menjadi satu-satunya yang berubah arah.

Mungkin cukuplah, untuk beberapa orang, dicintai dari punggungnya saja. Mungkin tidak perlu ada suara. Jika suatu waktu kamu berharap dia menoleh, itu sungguh hal yang biasa. Kamu mengenalnya dari belakang. Mencintainya dari sekumpulan angan. Menganggapnya luar biasa dari sekelebat persepsi yang bisa saja salah.

Tapi beberapa perasaan cukup dipandang seperti itu. Sesederhana kamu yang jatuh hati dengan melihat dari punggungnya saja.

Stay Humble

We don't have any reasons not to be humble.
Upon our words and weakness. Upon other people's.
Too many books, too many writings claim that keeping the ego will take you to the next level of success. I believe that, once. Listening to others cost a lot.
First, it eats your time.
Second, it doesn't always come beautifully or nice to hear. Sometimes, it's just harsh.
Third, you probably will get stuck, rethinking about everything once you ever decide.

But there is always a time, in life, you have to put your great ego behind under you rug of heart. Keep it safe and warm and no need to show it. You stay humble by not telling that listening to others will waste your time, as if your time is the most valuable asset in the world. Well, probably it is, but there is always a time, again, when you will save more time by listening to others. Taking good advices. Stay thoughtful and leave the ego for a while.

All I know, it's good for you. And for your health, too. Keeping your ego and acting selfish are tiring. Plus old-fashioned.

Another Personality Test

You are something of a traditionalist in your approach to life and you see the most beauty in classic forms and styles. A true socialite, you love a sense of the grandiose and your style reflects this strong elegance. You are thoughtful and original in your outlook. You like to be made to think and often seek out ways to expand your horizons.

Lively and confident, you're someone who likes to make a big impression. You understand that first impressions count and that you won't always get a second chance. You've got great taste and strive to be one step ahead of the crowd. Your passion for fashion means you've got a bit of a reputation amongst your friends for creating your own style. Keeping an eye on the trends, you know what suits you but while adopting the values of society in dress and taste, you are just as concerned with inward, spiritual beauty as with looks. The key is to allow yourself to appreciate life's journey while holding fast to that which matters most to you. 

go try it, I get it from tyapratiwi's post.

Hallucinate

You get what you believe, you earn what you ask. You stand in between, it means no. You carefully step back, it was clueless. As clueless as it can be. Be it.
You don't go for a yes, you justify, you mistify, you (try to) clarify, later you just lie.
Run from your desire. Running so far that you might not recall a thing, beautiful or no. Making some stories, creating, and much hallucinating.
Then forgetting. What is ridiculous because it is plain obvious.

Have Yourself Some Faith

Isn't it weird how we, youngsters, nowadays easily believe in such designer jeans campaign,

believe that one day that super fitted dark blue pair will turn into a comfortable one with fades you'd like to have?
Finally, you stride yourself to the nearest store, get one, and prove it by yourself.
Why do you do that? The most easiest reason is because others have done that also.

Nah, now you've seen a lot of successful people, inspiring ones, the creative creatures.
Get back to the previous lines.
You gotta do it, gotta prove it,
because of what? Others have done that also.

Briefly not jeans campaign, but really
if they can do it well, you might do it better. Go ahead, try.

Towards Opportunities

Singapore, Sep 2012

We're a set of anything that has ever happened to us. A set of decisions we've made. A set of experience, recklessness, ruthless agenda, and a burst of joy. How we think and respond to stuffs, they made us. Where we have been, they molded us. We change over time. Either for good, either otherwise. It depends.. on this skin, this flesh, this soul that intertwine to each other.

Collecting every sharp moment when you feel most alive, never let those moment go, probably that is where you belong. For me personally, there are quite moments I feel to the most. Waiting for SMRT by staring at the minute counter, sipping on the real thai tea while talking with best friends, doing things I was very afraid of doing.

There are a lot.. a lot of stuffs once I doubted to do.

Going abroad all by myself, greeting somebody that no longer talk to me, eating Thai pancake for the very first time, learning how to dance, having an audition, being in charge of certain roles in a musical, mailing someone I respect too much.. and more.

Most of the time, at that kind of moments, I really choose not to second-guess myself. To stand firm and do those without thinking twice. Not telling you that consideration is a bad idea, that's how I encourage myself.

And most of the time, those moments I strive myself to do wholeheartedly become priceless ones.

Life is full of opportunities which you sometimes think you can not afford. You also bring along goodness, distinction, and any other thing you barely can mention if you have not tried everything.

Go ahead, life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

Kahlil Gibran's

Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:

For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.

Once

Once everyone is an ignorant, a realistic, a damn hard-tempered, a love non-believer.
Once they keep the bitterness, spread it around, carry it within, stroll down with it.
Once they got tired.
They think building a wall of bitterness will save them from more complex, profound heartache.
They think having a thick shield will ease them up from every suffering that emotion can pour into them.
Once, at that moment, they do not realise that carrying, owning, and nurturing bitterness will cost them a bunch. A bunch of painful memories they can not let go, strokes of ego they can not tame, scratches that multiply over time.

Once they fell.

Too weak because what is inside is hollow,
deep filthy emptiness that bitterness successfully builds.

Once you know your pain, anger, disappointment will not there to save you.
They might get you beaten for twice, or more, but that does not mean you gotta live with them forever.
Once you know you no longer need them, you forgive and smile a lot.
Bitterness dimes you, so does hatred.

Once you just know, well again, you are worth loving without them, really.
So come on, wipe it off.

20

Most of the time we let days passing without bothering much about everything. We let it slide, let it glide. Flourished with beauty of every single laughter, warmth from friends, or passing a stranger we barely knew, once moment a go. I let February roll in a fast fast pace. So fast that when I look back, I get quite astonished to find out.. people are here and there to keep the others sane. Or otherwise.
My 20th birthday, is just like, another birthday.
It got a bit special on 9 am. But I was sooo grateful, to be healthy, alive, and happy. Everything is blessing. Beyond words.
What wishes for this year?
Graduating from college with a good score, getting an internship in a lovely company, having more emotional bonding with people whom I love, secretly learning how to cook, spending more time to do yoga for restoring true power, drinking less caffeine and more juice, making new friends, and be more grateful.
Putting more faith, I am ready to shine.
 Of course, brighter than usual.

My Favorite Things between Holidays

taken from here

1. Waking up late without being dizzy and sickened after that.
2. Getting my jobs done on schedule.
3. My Vegas Volt, a true true love.
4. Seeing best friends after days cannot meet each other.
5. Reading a decent book before hitting the bed.
6. Good hair day.
7. Writing on my new daily planner.
8. Reading brainpickings.org and smile when finding good lines.
9. Knowing the loved one always waking up early.
10. Curling inside blankets between rain while listening to my iPod.

Kindness

taken from here

Life, it offers you unlimited opportunities, battles. It comes with abundance, along God follows and takes care of your path. Believe you are blessed, of course you are. Don't take seriously people who try to make you feel bad, they probably have bigger fears they cannot express.
Life, it always smiles back at you when you greet it with an open arms, with bunch of love, being careful, and forgiving. There's no such place for those who fail at forgiving.

Why? For every kindness sets you free.